Umbrellas. Rubbish. Fact.

Surely an umbrella is the worst designed thing there ever was?

Problem 1. They don't do what they are designed to do. If you've been out and about in the UK today and used an umbrella I bet you still got wet. And not just a little wet, quite a bit wet. Wear a hat and buy a waterproof coat. Much better.

Problem 2. They break, easily, all the time, Look at that picture above. Look at this Flickr set. How old is the oldest umbrella in your house? Over two years? Thought not.

Problem 3. They're aggressive little beggars. Nothing frightens me more than a narrow street packed with umbrella users. I raise my hands to protect my eyes and I quicken my pace...

Umbrellas. Dreadful things.

Comments

[Jon Heslop]

i whole heartedly agree.

people always always lose them too.

[Loïc Boyer]

Last sunday, in the middle of a wet crowd of crossing umbrellas and trying to make a one-eyed gentleman out of me, I was thinking: "Why can't you all suckers wear a hood, as I do?".
But I have to admit that the elegance of a lone silhouette with an umbrella up his/her head, is something worth beeing wet - or worth losing an eye.

Gene Kelly dressed as Humprey Bogart? Oh no.

[Prescott Perez-Fox]

I don't own any umbrellas. Most of the time I don't mind getting a little wet, and if it's that severe, chances are I'll just find a discarded or forgotten one in no time at all.

[Caspian]

some clever sod had attached a waterpistol the the shaft of one that sticks two fingers up at a storm, and the local police no doubt.
http://swissmiss.typepad.com/weblog/umbrellas/index.html

[Andy]

My umbrella is from Muji and it's the best I've found. It's incredibly light, really strong (only been turned inside out once in four years) and it has a strap so you can wear it like a sword and look like a ninja)

http://www.muji.eu/pages/online.asp?V=1&Sec=6&Sub=30&PID=2040&CHK=Y

[vos broekema]

Hence the one and only Dutch umbrella, because our weather sucks as much as yours: http://www.senzumbrellas.com/index.php?id=3

Patented frame withstands 70 MPH gales! (100 km/h)

[Coops]

I've got a Paul Smith umbrella that's lasted me 4 years so far and still looks like new. Yes, I know - I have impeccable style and taste.

[Mat Ranson]

At least those discarded brollies are in a bin. We were all talking about how many we'd seen on the floor. What sort of person just drops a broken umbrella on the floor where they're standing when it breaks?

[pussreboots]

My oldest umbrella is 17 years old. The second oldest is 13 years old. Why? I never use them! I mostly rely on my rain jacket and hood. It's a ghastly pink but it keeps me dry.

[Alicia]

The broken ones always remind me of crumpled birds, fallen from the sky. I keep meaning to collect them up and make a sculpture.

My mum has a lovely polkadot brolly from the 80s that she bought in Bourdeaux, very sturdy and with a strap so you can wear it on your back too. Maybe the problem isn't with the design, but the super-cheap throw-away manufacturing.

[Hamish Robertson]

I've been photographing these obsessively for years, because of Paul Auster's New York Trilogy. See them at:

http://www.defeatingtheobject.com/umbrellas/launch.html

[Rob Mortimer]

100m on way to work my umbrella flips, bends, breaks.

So I am now drenched in a cold office.

[Chris H]

As well as the Senz (of which I've bought 2) there's also the dorktastic http://www.nubrella.com/ . Always interested in why things like this come in clumps of new products.

[Ben]

That Nubrella is mental.

[Tamlyn]

I'd just like to say to anyone who's lost an umbrella in London that it's probably at my house. We've got about 7 of them and none of them are mine. I don't know where they come from.

[Paulpod]

Lost count of the crap umbrellas I've owned, some broke, most were mislaid on the floors of bars or cinemas.

Now I live in Wales where we get proper rain, I upgraded from ok-but cheap raincoat to a proper Gore-Tex thing. Plus waterproof trousers for outdoor all day stuff, and a proper roll-top rucksack for Wales/London carrying stuff (laptop, etc). Never been drier.